no expectations, but if you wanted to make my day, or show a little kindness, click here.

so i decided to try this. after distributing two packets of the dye throughout my hair (it’s quite long), i then proceeded to wrap my head up in plastic clingwrap (as i didn’t have a plastic shower cap), and left it in my hair for about two hours.

i unwrap my hair, and rinse it out, and it looks quite red, which makes me happy, but then i realised every time i ran my brush through my hair, huge clumps of my hair would come off with the brush! i wasn’t that worried at first, seeing as a i have a lot of hair, and it’s quite normal to get a fair amount of hair come out after dying – but it just kept coming out! and then i realised my mistake.

i had forgotten that the dye i use also lightens as well as colours, so in effect i was semi-bleaching my hair as well as colouring it. so that is why it ruined my hair lol
my hair is noticeably thinner, and very very dry. it is definitely due for a haircut (which luckily, i have a voucher for a haircut at some high-end salon to use!)

so yeah, learnt my lesson, won’t be using that dye again any time soon. for now, focus on getting my hair healthy looking again, and maybe go back to being brown.

anyway, no expectations, but if you’re in a giving mood: http://www.gofundme.com/bkyyw

yeah, we’ve found a place :) and we’re moving in at the end of the week. unfortunately, kalen’s fallen ill at a bad time, so he’s not been able to do any packing. i, however, have been busy washing all our clothes, packing them into bags and sorting through some boxes of my old stuff in the shed, as i’m trying to reduce the amount of stuff i have for the move.

i’m slightly worried that i myself, will end up sick too. my neck aches atm, and i have spent all weekend nursing my poor sick boyfriend. i don’t intend on being sick and i hope it stays that way.

we are both very excited about moving to a new place, of our own, and close to my family and friends, as well as much closer to town for kalen’s work and just going out in general. now it won’t take ages to get home from anywhere! :)

and now i think i’ll continue to enjoy my music, and hope that the calm wave of sleep drifts over me soon enough…

anyway, firstly, just wanted to say, that i’m still pretty much in the same predicament in terms of employment, or lack thereof. however, i am very hopeful that will change soon, as myself and Kalen will be moving closer to town soon, and the opportunities for me to gain employment should rise a shitload. we are aiming to move into an area that has easy access to 3 major shopping centres and the city. we were originally looking for a share house, in which we could join but looking for two rooms in the one house is proving to be a bit of a challenge and the chances of finding a nice enough house with nice people, are rare indeed. the places we’d visited weren’t good enough, or we didn’t feel we could live there.

so then we thought about the idea of getting of our own place and having the same kind of set-up we have atm; that is, kalen and myself plus one house-mate in a 3 bedroom place, with a room each for our stuff/computers and to chill in for watching movies, and having me-time, and the bed being in kalen’s room (which we obviously sleep in together). but seeing as there is a lack of house-mates around via people we know, we’ve decided we’re going to go for a two bedroom place of our own, with no other house-mates. so i’ve been doing the searching, and kalen does the contacting (as i can’t hear very well on the phone) and i’ve been on the hunt for the past two-three months, looking online practically every night, searching for places that fit our criteria, and particular our criteria is. while we realise we can’t afford to be picky, we do want to upgrade from living in a shitty house. our current house is, in effect, quite shit-house. it’s old, the roof eroded some time late last year, so we had leakage problems, the bathroom wall has a hole in it, the tiles in the shower have black stuff leaking out of the bottom layer, the hot water system is growing some kind of rooted wet ecosystem on the floor in the laundry, part of the laminated floor in kalen’s room is ripped so i’ve tripped on it a few times, the blinds in his room are broken, as well as the wooden blinds in our housemates room, and half the downlights in the house don’t work.  not to mention when we do clean the place up, it still looks grotty. so who can blame us for wanting to upgrade, huh? considering we’ve found places that are cheaper than the place we’re in now, and they’re practically brand new, or like new, with air-con, ceiling fans, built-in wardrobes, none of which this house has.

so the things we’re looking for in our new place are:

• nice enough looking kitchen,  modern with dishwasher included.
• ceiling fans in bedrooms or air conditioner in at least one of the rooms or lounge/dining area.
• nice enough looking bathroom with no shower curtains, no ugly tiles, preferably modern or newly renovated.
• two rooms – one of a bigger size for kalen’s queen bed and his big desk + stuff, other room can be of a smaller size, as it will pretty much just be my ‘study’/chillzone + where i put my stuff/cupboards.
• little to no or easy maintenance lawn (hence why we’re eyeing off units… you don’t have a yard to deal with)
• rest of house we’re not too fussy with, as long as it’s roomy enough in the loungeroom, and we have somewhere to put our dryer and washing machine.
• fresh looking/newly painted looking. so a place that’s been built within the last decade or so. we don’t want a grubby looking place, kthnx.

things have been going great. sure it’s not anywhere near perfect or even ideal… or even good… BUT, i’m choosing to see things from a positive point of view rather than a negative. sure i’m poor, but i’m working towards changing that. i’ve found something to put my focus into and i like that i can work towards something and not just be drifting along, doing nothing and getting nowhere. i’m not living in the streets, i can buy myself food and keep myself fed everyday, i can shower whenever i want, i have all the time in the world to do nothing… i still haven’t found a job but i’m not letting that get to me. i am in a happy relationship (with Kalen still, yes – we ended up getting back together after a month or so of “breaking up”. he’s seriously the best boyfriend i have ever had [cept for that minor hiccup we had back in may/june]).

i was asked to write a dreams list of 100 dreams i had… so i did, and so now i want to strive to achieve my dreams. when you write it down on paper, it doesn’t seem so impossible… i’ve found i’ve already achieved some of the smaller dreams, and that helps push me along to gaining bigger and bigger dreams. my main dream is to get my license and a car. i still haven’t gotten around to it, becos something always comes up and i never have the money or i forget about it when i do have the money. oh well. that’s beside the point, the point is… having my dreams on a list and striving towards them, gives me a purpose, gives me a focus… gives me hope.

on another note, what i would like to say tho is i’m sick of being negative. i’m sick of people being negative towards me, for whatever reasons. life isn’t that bad really when you think about it. okay so you’re not rich and you’re not living your ideal life, but that doesn’t mean one day things won’t get better!! things will get better, specially if you do something about it!! i no longer want to put up with people being rude or dragging me down into their misery. i want to be happy and i will be happy. i’m rly going to try and not let anyone stop me. which for those of you who know me, can be quiet difficult for me at times.

and can i please remind people… if you can’t say anything nice, DON’T SAY ANYTHING AT ALL!!!! - seriously, what do you gain from saying a mean comment to someone… nothing. its mean, its horrible and it’s not needed. people need to show more love and care towards one another instead of being cunts towards each other. i find everyday i am questioning why the fuck people say the mean shit they say… why can’t more people be nice to each other??

anyway, i’m bored of babbling on about shit on here. just wanted to point out, i’m still alive, but just more silent in the world of blogs. i do post on my tumblr from time to time – definately more often than i do on here… so keep an eye on that if you’d like. or not, its up to you. toodles. x